i have changed my blog to

http://iknowthiswillpass.blogspot.com/

Humans here , do your know whats the saddest thing in life , its to lose or lost someone you love .
if your have realised something is difference in my facebook .
yeah , perhaps im not good enough for you , thats why ...
But my feelings for you have never change since day2 . and i know it will never .

nabei i dono whats happening .. i feel so down , from the start of the morning .. when i see FB . FB was the cause of it ... i wanted to talk to someone .. but i couldnt find .. i dono how to start .. too much things too talk .. i feel like telling my uncle everything .. i feel that he could understand how i felt .. maybe i should tell him after work .. i wanted his advice .. but what if he tell grandma about it .. i dont know . i dont know where i want to go or do .. life is really hard .. i feel that im someone whose despo for love.. i cannot dont have love .. ..... i wants to commit suicide .. and ya .. i should not tell my friends that cos uncle says that he wont make friends w/ppl that everyday wants to die .. but now im telling livejournal . so its okay . i just hope that i will never ever wake up again .. or i hope that this was just a nightmare .........................a nightmare that i will soon wake up ..... I WISHED I COULD JUST HUGGED YOU )':

gucci ! woah.. if i could afford this bag .. i

FUCK . FUCK . FUCK . I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH TO BE TRUE .. I FIND OUT THAT I LOVE YOU MORE THAN I LOVE MYSELF ! FUCK SHIT !!! WHY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH? WHY WHY WHY ... WHY I ALWAYS LOVE A GUY UNTIL CAN DIE ! REALLY FUCK UP ... FUCK LA . NABEI CCB . WHENEVER THE MORE I LOVE YOU , THE MORE YOU PUSH ME AWAY . MY DESIRE FOR YOUR LOVE HURTS ME ! FUCK SHIT STUPID .

i have notice ur change .. and i know i wont let go .. do you know how much i want to see you? i wanted to see you on 30NOV becos maybe got class gathering ... so im risking my life just to see you my dear .. even if its just for a minute .. im fine .. i really really miss you alot .. you won't understand .. Even when you said 'no' in msn ..my heart broke . but i wont question you more .. becos i know u would get irritated , i don want that to happen .. OK . i didnt blame you . So long as you're happy , im happy too . :)

TOday ... i find work getting tiring and tiring .. i hate waking up early and prepare myself for work .. i want to sleep .. :( .. but for money sake , i shall go .. i want to buy something nice for dear.. but i cant spent too much money .. IM NOT SELFISH .. its just that my mother will ask me where is the large amount of money gone to .. for me , i wont mind spending a large amount of money for my love one . i just want to know what you like , so i can buy something you like for you .. and you tell me to stop asking .. i dowan to buy something you don like .. nevermind dear i will listen to you and stop asking , i will try my best to buy something best for you .. :)
Lunch went out to jack's place @ bras basah w/uncle . i ate beef(steak) when im not suppose to :P haha.. until now, im still not hungry .. yay ! can diet .. lol .. talked alot w/;uncle .. i really enjoy talking to him .. he again told me to study hard , i really want to listen to him and be a useful person in the future .. but i donno why i don have the heart to do so .. i dono why ...i also asked him many questions about relationships .. and i find it quite useful .. he also told me his style of wooing girls .. haaha. interesting . I really feel that whoever could marry him in the future is a really lucky women .. good luck ! :) HOPe i could marry the prince charmng deep in my hear too .. :)
love you bii ;) Bii , i just want to tell you this ..

im so hurt this few days .. i feel that you change alot .. im worried that you are going to leave me .. i put on a fake smile infront of everybody but deep in my heart , my heart is hurting , bleeding , breaking . I don feel good . i purposely spend money to make myself happy and satisfied but it does't work .. i go for pedicure . i bought my GUESS wallet ..and i spent more than a $100 this weekend .. .. but my mood didn't improve .. i also went to church .. yes , becos i wanted to be a christian for you . Cos you meant alot to me . thats why . DID your feelins for me really fade ? i don't know . im afraid . i cant take the hurt anymore . This few days im thinking alot ..alot ....
have you fallen for another girl? or am i not good for you? or your feelings really do fade ? or are you stress? i meant you well .. do you find me irritating now?
I don get why guys always treat girl so so so well when they haven got the girl or when they are w/ the girl for the first month ..
tyhen when they start getting tired of the girl , they will slowly change their attitude ..
stop being mushy and caring .. but girls could be faithful for their lives . they mean it when they are willing to say iloveyouforever . they really do . Lile most TV shows , mistress are often treated better than their own wives . They can buy gold and things the mistress like .. and make the wives stay at home and do housework .. also never give thm this kind of benefits .. lol . WOMEN lives ARE like this .
Its never easy to find a guy which could love you for lives .. 要找一个爱你一生一世的人是不容易的。。

For i cant l cant live without you ! Today i in office keep thinking , what if one day you really leave me . I dont know what i can fend for . I wont know whats life and happiness is all about . If you had not step into my life , i think my life will still be in total darkness , i can thank no one but you ! :) My greatest wish is that you will never ever leave me . BUt i don have much confidence that you will ALways stay by my side . COsyou told me that wont promise me that i wont cut myself again .. :( 我真得很害怕有一天会失去你。我知道没有你的日子会很难过。我不能想象没有你，我会成为一个怎么样的人。是你让我找到幸福 。。 我会用我一生来爱你。

ok okk ok ok kkk ... fine .. Im really very disappointed that you treat ur 'brother' better than me ! You listened to what he said rather than to side w/me . YOu make me really angry and want to cry in the office .. i really feel like showing you my anger and my feeling , but bcos i love you, i didnt ! I dont want you to find me a very 小气 girlfriend and give this excuseto leave me .

This few day dono why so tired .. can sleep all the way till morning . Guess , its becos of my eyes .. Monday woke up to be abit swollen .. actually dowan go work ..but father , uncle say ok .. so for money sake go lor .. then after that in the aftnn starts to get itchy ! so at night go see doctor . and the doctor fee is exactly the same as what i have earned for the day ! LOL . how coincidence this can be !


FinALLy finally , tomrw is FRIDAY again ! YEA ! really very very happy :) ! cause saturday can go shopping again ! this tyme i wanted to buy , lol i also dono .. hahaah .
okok .. shall end here , going watch the penguin dad in channel 8 . its nice ! haahahahahahaaah

思念是一种痛 。。。